ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
