i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
