I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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