Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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