brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
