Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
We named our party play list daddy issues
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize