Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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