Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
