I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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