I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
