Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
