I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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