Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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