So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
