i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Randomize
