I think i sorta joined a cult last night
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
