Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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