More tranny stories later!
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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