I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
vagina is talking i cant
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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