also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize
