I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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