No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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