my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
