bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
