dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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