so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
false alarm, still single
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
