as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
