so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
