"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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