i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
