It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
