Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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