I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
