Got a toothbrush?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
