Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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