I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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