I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
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