He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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