I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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