She is in my trunk
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
