This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
