There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize