Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
