When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Randomize