im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
