i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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