Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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