you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
