she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize