Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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